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Step One
- Make a post (public, friends locked, filtered...whatever you're comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.
- If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.
- Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ so that the holiday joy will spread.

Step Two
- Surf around your friendslist (or friends friends, or just random journals, or [info]holiday_wishes/[info]wish_list) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:
- If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.
You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.
There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.

1. Good book recommendations...  Oprah book club type book.  Easy to read, don't consume a lot of mental/emotional energy
2. Crock pot recipes that are ingredients usually on hand that can cook all day (10 hours or so)
3. A deep cleaning/organizing of my house
4. Homemade cookies and Christmas candy
5. Fresh Lavender to be dried
6. lavender bath smelly good stuff
7. Postcards, pictures or letters for Alex - getting mail is a HUGE deal to him
8. Deer Antlers for my dogs
9. Animal shelter donations in Freedom's name
10. A hand painted/ hand drawn pictures of Freedom - I really really miss my dog
said_by_me: (Default)
Let's do an ask me anything post.

No topic off limits, just ask. You can ask logged in or anon.
said_by_me: (Default)
Because [ profile] lawngnome25 is too cool not to copy

Tell me a deep dark secret. Send me love letters, hate mail or anything else you want to share! Anon posting is on, IP logging is off.
said_by_me: (Default)
I'm jumping on the bandwagon here and making the once in awhile Anonymous post. So say anything. Tell me a secret. Tell me some gossip. Tell me I suck monkey balls. Anything goes except, you know, death threats or illegal activity and that sort of thing. Anon posting is enabled. IP logging is off. Comments are not screened though in a day or two I'll make the entry private.

Have fun. Play nice.
said_by_me: (Default)
A little about me...

There are some new people here and well, its probably good to reiterate for the old ones too.  I am who I am.  Good and bad, imperfect and human.  A lot of labels can fit me, if you choose to mold them enough. I am opinionated and often outspoken. I stand up for what I believe in, I fight for the things I think are worth fighting for and I either love or hate just about everyone. Its when I feel ambivalent about someone, I know its time to move on.

I am a single mom, a full time employee and a full time student.  Pretty much in that order as far as time, energy and sanity goes.  I tend to be a little ADD in my posting, much as I am in real life *ooh shiny object!* I write like I talk and I walk my talk, at least most of the time.  Some of my friends on here have been my friend since I started way back in 2001 with LJ, more though are ones I have met in various parenting communities.  I don't believe that my son defines me but to say that motherhood is not my existence would be stupid. My world does in fact revolve around a 3.5 foot tall midget that is not housebroken.  The other axis of that world revolves around a furry 4 legged boy that is housebroken.

Anything else that you want to know, feel free to ask, anonymously or otherwise.  Comments are screened.
said_by_me: (me and freedom)
So here is something I don't understand...

If a woman formula feeds, as a breastfeeding advocate- I am expected to still be friends with her. After all, its her choice, not mine.

If a woman is a SAHM, lives off welfare by choice without helping herself or has 10 kids before she is 25- I am expected to be friends with her, because those are her choices, not mine. Despite the fact that my life is very different and I find at least one of those things downright appalling.

Yet when it comes to the election, our political candidates and the propositions we supported or opposed- we are all supposed to either agree and hate the other side or lose friendships if we dare to disagree. Or worse, we have the opportunity to be the butts of jokes, the silent targets of rants or ridiculed, and yes, this is happening on both sides of the fence.

Its not right, its not acceptable and its no longer ok with me. The right to vote is just that. A right to cast a ballot in favor or opposition of the measures put before you. It is not a requirement that we hate the other side. Its not a requirement that we be nasty, petty and cruel. And its surely not a requirement that all people calling each other friends must vote the same way.

I understand that this proposition was emotional to many. The fact is, at least in CA, that this is the SECOND time the voters have overturned this amendment to constitution. Right, wrong or indifferent, the voters have spoken. Its time for people to understand that most supporters of Prop 8 are not bigots, homophobes, people filled with hate or brainwashed idiots. They are people that voted the way their conscience told them to. You have the right to vote purple to become the next state color if its put on the ballot, I have the right to vote green. Neither one of us is stupid or misguided, we are simply exercising our rights.

So consider this your warning. I am well aware of the innuendo, the barbs of hatred and I am done. Your journal is, and always will be, YOUR journal. I cannot make you be kind, understanding, compassionate or kind. I can, and will, remove myself from the situation though if the insults don't stop.

I love my friends but please do not mistake this caring about you as a willingness to be abused.

ETA: I have no desire to point fingers or call names. I am just asking from today forward that we all go back to being friends.
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Updating this for [ profile] adopt_a_momapplication.

Alex was born 5/2 via c-section after 24 hours of labor and many drugs. He latched in the recovery room and a couple times the next day but refused after that. The hospital LC hooked me up with formula and an SNS. I was exhausted enough and scared enough that I figured LC = good advice. We got home on 5/4 and my milk came in the following day. I got fully engorged and he refused to latch even with the SNS. I went out that day and bought a pump and feed him EBM via bottles thinking that EBM is better than formula and it wouldn't be that hard to get him back to the breast with a little work. I continued to offer the breast, we had lots of skin to skin contact, he continued to refuse. I went to an LLL meeting, got some more tips and he began latching occasionally. This entire time I am pumping 6-7 times a day and offer the breast first at each feeding. 

I don't think I really ever stopped to think how hard it would be to transition him from a bottle to a breast.  I simply wasn't as knowledegable as I thought I was at the time. I was so frustrated and things not going as planned.  I was so tired from the whole birthing experience.  I was also so scared of my son not having enough to eat that I did the first thing I could think of.

Around 6 weeks he started latching about 30% of the time. We just kept practicing. Around 9 weeks he got the hang of side lying nursing, life became better because I was getting more sleep. I should mention he has also had a nasty bout of colic, thrush and I have had to eliminate soy and dairy from my diet.

He is 12 weeks old today and we are celebrating a week of being bottle free when he and I are together.

At 10 weeks 5 days, he was 24.5 inches and 11 lbs 13 oz up from 21.5 and 7 lb 10 oz at birth. Its been a very long journey, one I naively thought I would be exempted from. Thank you everyone in this community for all the advice, encouragement and support. If I hadn't gotten the information and become a "boob-nazi", I surely would have given up long ago.

Its been 2 months since I wrote the information above. Alex is still 100% breastfed despite recommendations from his doctor and our friends that he be starting solids by now. I have gone back to work since then, working full time. I also cannot remember the last time I held a bottle to feed my son. At his 4 month checkup, he weighed 13lbs 8oz and measured in at 26.5 inches long. It is amazing to me that I was able to nourish that growth in him.

I went back to work when Alex was 13 weeks old. I was very afraid that the stress of going back, the lack of sleep and the time away from him would diminish my supply. I made lactation cookies the weekend before I went back, stocked up on Mother's Milk tea and Fenugreek. So far I haven't had a reason to use any of those. I am able to pump before I leave in the morning and twice while I am at work. The separation is still hard for me though. I miss my son dearly while I am gone. My favorite part of the day is coming home to him and our snuggle time. When I pick him up from daycare, he rubs his face on my shirt, pats my breasts and snuffles into them. Almost like he is as happy to see them as he is to see me! Once we are home, we lay on the couch together and snuggle while he nurses. I holds my shirt in one hand and strokes my arm with his other. I hear deep sighs of contentment and get sleepy drunk baby smiles out of him the entire time. This from a child that arched his back, screamed and yelled in frustration at being offered the breast and not a bottle.

Its been almost 5 months since Alex was born. Our bond is huge and he is firmly attached to me. Like any relationship that comes to and then overcomes great hurdles, we are strong in our attachment. He is had only 2 ounces of formula and I am so proud of that fact. I am proud that I was able to overcome our difficulties, that he was able to overcome them. I got a lot of flak from my friends for pushing the issue of breastfeeding so hard. I used a lot of tears of frustration on our latch issues. Yet, I wouldn't change it for the world. Not for one second. I think because of the issues we have had, my breastfeeding relationship with Alex is that much more important to me. We had to work hard to get where we are and I won't let anything stand in the way of it flourishing.

When I found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted to breastfed although I also thought "If it doesn't work out, formula is fine too". Then I started doing some research and decided that I would do it for the first 3 months. Then it became 6 months. I was paired with an [ profile] adopt_a_mommentor and my goal became a year. Now after having my son, learning more about the amazing effects of breastmilk, Alex will get to determine the length of our breastfeeding relationship. This relationship is for him, his health and our bond. I think that he should be the one to say "when" on the length of it.

Alex will be 9 months old tomorrow.  It has gone by way too fast.  He is a 100% breastfeed happy baby.  He loves to nurse.  It is our bonding time together when I get home from work.  Its a fast way to pick up where we left of in the morning.  He started on solids around 6 months and loves them.  So far the only thing he has full out rejected is peas.  He loves mashed potatoes, pears and sweet potatoes.  He loves table food and enjoys eating in general.  I have been bleesed with my son. 

The nursing relationship I have with him is one I will always cherish.  Granted it started out hard but it has been so worth it.  All the struggles we went through in the early months paid off and he and I are bonded even more so because of it.  My desire to nurse until he self weans is as fierce as ever. I cannot imagine how hard it will be for me when he is done.

Its been an amazing year.  It went by way too fast.   In hidsight,  my original short term goals of making it to 6 months and then a year are amusing to me now.  I cannot imagine denying my son breastmilk.  As long as he chooses to nurse, I am commited to doing so.  

Alex us a child that my body grew and then bore and has now nourished his entire life.  He does enjoy table food but it has been a huge source of bonding for us to be able to nurse at bedtime.  It is rare that our evenings end with him falling asleep any other way. 

I could never have gotten this far without the support of the breastfeeding communities, LLL meetings and friends.

Its been almost 15 months and we are still going strong.  Alex has yet to have cows milk and I am grateful my supply has maintained his thirst, albeit with a little help from Domperidone.  I am so grateful I persisted through those hard first few months.  They were all worth it for one nursing session now. 

Its been 21 months and Alex is showing no sign of losing interest in his NumNums.  He still nurses before bed and naps and usually once or twice a night.  I am so thankful we got cosleeping and sidelying nursing down.  I am sure it has saved me countless hours of sleep by now.  My little baby is turning into a little boy and I am in awe that my body nutured his so wholly.  

It is amazing to me that 2 years ago, I was going to my first LLL meeting.  I was a scared, uninformed, frustrated mom. And yet, look at us now!  Alex is still nursing, most of the time its only for a few minutes before bed and nap, I know in my heart this is out of comfort more than anything.

He and I are so bonded, so attached and he is so comfortable with me.  I love that aspect that breastfeeding has given us. Somedays I feel touched out, tired of nursing, wondering if he will ever stop.  I have to remind myself on those days that I will soon look back and wonder where the time went, how he got so old and miss the days we have now.

Alex has definitely weaned.  Its been a good 6 weeks since he has asked to nurse.  He refers to them as being for babies and he is a "big boy".  I am relieved that we are done, sad to lose the nursing relationship and yet proud of what we accomplished.  He had well over 2 years worth of breastmilk longer than my initial goal.  I have confidence in myself because I stuck it out and pride for the fact that we did it.  Through all the struggles and heartache, we succeeded

December 2012



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